Tuesday, September 05, 2017

Lock Who Up?

     Donald Trump represents a number of firsts as a sitting U. S. president including the first one to be involved in a TV reality show. As you may have heard, President Trump continues to be the executive producer of the show The New Celebrity Apprentice. What you likely haven’t heard about are his other TV production plans including the following shows:

Twitter Wars
     Each week, President Trump will select three new Twitter opponents and challenge them to a social media duel. Be it Alec Baldwin, Rosie O’Donnell or the cast of Saturday Night Live, the Twitter war will continue until the victim surrenders or Trump moves on to a new perceived enemy.
Pay for Play
     Pay for Play breaks new ground as television’s first political game show. Filmed at Trump International Hotel in Washington, D. C., two panels of foreign diplomats and trade representatives will compete for prizes like preferential trade treatment, easy market access and tariff exemptions by booking rooms in Trump hotels, buying Trump-branded products and out-flattering the host, one Donald J. Trump.
Apocalypse Soon
     Loosely based on the film Apocalypse Now, this new weekly TV drama will follow the adventures of a fictional American president named Ronald K. Drumpf as he singlehandedly takes on everyone from ISIS to North Korea to Michael Moore. Given his amazing gut-centric decision-making abilities, President Drumpf needs no intelligence briefings from the CIA, FBI or NSA. As executive producer, it remains unclear if Donald Trump will also perform in the starring role although one thing is almost for certain: the show is unlikely to last the full four seasons contracted.
Meet the Supremes
     It looks like President Trump will not only produce but also host this new TV reality show. A dozen potential Supreme Court nominees will share a house and compete for a single seat on the nation’s highest bench. Competitions will include “Strengthening the Second Amendment”, “Ignoring the First Amendment” and “Antonin Scalia Impressions.”
Lock Who Up?
     Based on talent shows like The Voice and American Idol, Lock Who Up? features handpicked political, entertainment and media personalities competing to avoid indictment and possible imprisonment. Contestants will plead their case to avoid prosecution on national TV before a celebrity judging panel comprising Rudy Giuliani, Chris Christie and Newt Gingrich. Viewers across America then get to phone in their votes each week to see who will get locked up.
President Trump’s Christmas Special

     Like any good executive producer, Donald Trump has a new Christmas TV special in the works. Guests include Donald’s friends Steve Bannon, Anthony Scaramucci and General “Mad Dog” Mattis who will join him in declaring an end to the War on Christmas, repeatedly wishing everyone Merry Christmas and tracking down Muslims, Mexicans and liberals who won’t. The special also features the song stylings of the KKK Sisters (Kellyanne Conway, Kayleigh McEnany and Katrina Pierson) as well as the Trump Family Singers who will reprise their hit song from the campaign: I’m Dreaming of a White America.

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